Awalnya hanya ada kesunyian

   I've been very alone for a number of years now, and I too dread weekends as I feel condemned to perpetual silence.

Even weekdays are a trial because I have begun to believe that no one I talk to particularly looks forward to seeing me. 

I try to be as kind as I know how, and I am not purposefully antagonistic toward people. I seem to bring people down apparently because my conversations gravitate toward bleakness.

I don't really have anything else to talk about though, because my life consists of a slew of problems and loneliness.

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